Affirm Everyday

AFFIRM EVERYDAY: PAIN IS AN OPPORTUNITY FOR GROWTH. Whatever tries to break me, will not. Instead, I use it to make me STRONGER. I AM my own. I AM disciplined. I AM powerful. I AM brave. I AM whatever I want to be, not what external forces deem me to be. There is nothing in the world that can stop me from obtaining what is meant for me…..

Typically, domestic violence & abuse victims [DVA] & ‘suffering in silence’ is associated with women, as there’s a bias in society that assumes domestic abuse only happens to women.

The shock, humiliation, embarrassment, confusion & being made to feel “useless”, that stems from being physically or psychologically abused by a partner you “love(d)” will trigger a myriad of emotions in any human, female OR male. It is not acceptable for EITHER to have to withstand DVA.

The extensive under-reporting of such ”crimes” is even more pronounced amongst men, as the role of masculinity & gender stereotypes step in. As a bloke, the fear of appearing unmanly, shamed & a failure to live up to masculine ideals prevents men speaking up about DVA against them. It feeds into concerns that they’re not going to be believed, which ironically helps to validate their experience, recognising that men too can be victims of DVA. Moreover, where children are involved, the terror that they are “used as a tool” with threats to leave, even more debilitating in preventing reporting; a fear of retaliation or a lack of trust/confidence in the authorities also a factor.

DVA victims may look & talk the same but inside they are forever traumatised. The stressed etched into their faces, maybe not even able to cry at all, exhausted. However, as daunting as it is to do the risky “speak up” thing, especially when it’s the right thing, I encourage anyone experiencing DVA to do just that, reminded that whatever tries to break you, won’t, unless you give it permission in your mind, so, navigate your PAIN to make yourself STRONGER, it is possible. Hard times are not final. Difficult circumstances don’t have to hold us down or ever define us…..

SUPPORT for victims of DVA @ Calan: www.calandvs.org.uk

LIVE FEAR FREE HELPLINE: 0808 801 0800 [UK]