Suffering

Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional — @haruki_murakami_

Having had several tough weeks of feeling cornered & excluded, triggering a myriad of emotions, dark thoughts have been clouding my mind #pain .

However, what I learned is that even when a situation seems very personal, even if others verbally attack, or conversely give you the “passive aggressive” silent treatment, it actually has nothing to do with you. What they say, how they behave & the opinions they voice are to do with the “agreements & perceptions” they have in their own minds – which is to do with THEM & NOT YOU. Nevertheless, being made to feel “alone” is not easy to “stay with”…..

Moreover, I realised that trying to decipher why other people “act up”, is just a waste of one’s conscious thought. Instead, I decided to STOP trying to figure them out & just become “comfortable” with the negative feeling of being excluded, realising that it is actually useful for me to “DARE” to stay with that pain & allow it to “JUST BE”, to own the fear of loneliness & trust that it will NOT always be there, it will pass – like everything does. As such, it occurred to me, that the tension I suffered was meant to put me in touch with the feelings I most need to give attention too. So, by “daring” to stay with that pain, I gave myself a shot at understanding some of my weaknesses better & in turn LEARNED something that I can use to my advantage on the forward…..

Hence, on any level, to not take attacks from other people personally & “flip the script” by “welcoming that angst” is of criticality, because if something is “painful” to you, it’s hitting an emotion or trauma in you that’s yet unresolved, so, to embrace it gives you the chance to explore why it hurts. One can then create a more robust, informed mindset in a contained manner & use the “pain of such attacks” in a way that helps one understand & fulfil a need that’s currently lacking. This way, there’s a chance to create “immunity” in the middle of what otherwise might “feel like hell” to save oneself much suffering. Once you can assign no blame to others, the better YOU’LL become & in turn the BETTER YOU’LL ATTRACT.